:: Thursday, October 30, 2003 ::

Yeah so here I am, procrastinating a little bit of math homework but when that is put in scope to how much I normally procrastinate, I'm doing quite well right now. My costume for halloween is complete, and it came out so so so so so good! You shall all see tomorrow. Hey I don't really have anything to say here. I've done all my work and today has worked out rather nicely. Hee haw!

Oh, and sharp rocks for updating his LJ so I don't think he's dead and such.

:: Floydthebarber 10/30/2003 08:43:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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Ahh, back to the old grind. Nobody ever comments in my blog; I guess none of you read it anymore. I guess I should do some terrible test like mention how incredibly depressed I am, and that I'm thinking of slashing myself all up, and the only thing I can think about is breaking up with Megan and quitting n-philes and crying in my room. You know, just to test everybody out there. Except 1) I just told you about this plan so if I did execute it, it wouldn't be taken seriously and 2) It'd do more harm than good.

I carved a pumpkin at Megan's house. I drew Bilbo's dagger Sting and traced it and it looks all spiffy. Megan's adding elvish letters carved along the top- very nice indeed. I camped, I was lazy, then I went to Megan's. And I forgot to get that mario bros display. God dammit. Ah well I had a much better time at her house. Man I'm diggin this fall back shit. I have chemistry and math to do, but I did read the first book in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Fun stuff. Whoops I just got back to typing this after ignoring it for about 10 minutes. Let's see.

Nobody gives a fuck here about my little life. I'm going to start spouting out my worthless opinions on my top 10 whats and nots of 2003. Yes. Mario kart lan party november 22nd holy fuck. yay.

:: Floydthebarber 10/26/2003 10:17:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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It's 10:50 and I'm patiently waiting for my printer to finish up with some of these images for a project that is due tomorrow. Never fear though, because the PSATs have cometh to my rescue to provide ample time for finishing this project. I felt lazy today anyways. Even as I type this, I feel incredibly lazy an uncompelled to inform anybody of anything that has happened recently. Hmmm let's see.

Ahh yes, the epic struggle between my life and that of my dad. He really wants me to go on the campout this weekend, and I really don't want to go. It's not that I don't enjoy camping, but after I've done as many things as I've done, travelling hours away into the mountains for the weekend to somewhere that I already spent an entire week of summer already seems sort of redundant. If I have a choice between seeing friends (I haven't seen ANYBODY that I've made friends with through megan in well over a month, tis very sad!) that I haven't seen in weeks, or going camping somewhere that I've already been to this year and don't feel compelled to go, the choice is pretty clear to me. I guess dad wouldn't get on my case if I had a job, or even if I was actively pursuing one. He probably also wouldn't bother me if I was doing work on my Eagle Project. Ah well. I am going this weekend, I will be gone all friday and saturday and I'll get back around 1 on Sunday. You guessed it; then I'm off to Megan's as soon as humanly possible because thoughts of being without her when it doesn't have to be so are unbearable. Hey, when it comes down to it in life, If I only had Megan, then things would be okay. I'll see everybody next weekend, I hopefully promise. One night will be friends over for gaming, and the other for some sort of gathering. Yes, I'm ordering one of you to plan a gathering over a week and a half in advance! Blarg.

The new Barenaked Ladies album is released in less than an hour, and after listening to it all last night and today I am once again hooked on the BNL. "Maybe Katie" "Shopping" and "War on Drugs" would have to be my faves at the moment. Go take a listen at them, why don't you? Hey Christina isn't mad at me anymore which is nice, except now I somehow managed to make Megan feel horrible about herself as if she's completely wrong and at fault for not liking Christina. I guess I did make it sound that way a little, but not wholly or anything. I can never say things exactally right for people anymore, even if I try very hard. I hope Christina has something to say to Megan, and maybe, just maybe, they'll have some mutual understanding instead of just some blind dislike toward each other. Actually Christina doesn't even dislike Megan that much but... Yeah see this is the type of stuff that goes through a mindless teenager's head. I guess I just had some weird dream where they both kissed and made up (hot lol jk) and I wouldn't feel awkward mentioning one to the other. I think I ask too much of people. Well I'm not asking either of them to change their opinions, just make those opinions known to the other side, I feel like neither of them knows how the other feels, and they should! So uh yeah whatever happens happens, no big deal. James is still here for both of them... Or they're here for me I should like to rather think.

How's that for rambling? Yeah I could go on and on about kids being hit by cars and everything else in the world, but sometimes a bellowing swab of a Q-Tip awaits me. G'night!

:: Floydthebarber 10/20/2003 10:52:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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So uh yeah, I'll sum up the weekend. Bear with me. Friday night let me remember... haha god damn. I can't remember what I did friday. This could be a bad sign. Well whatever, friday happened. Megan went to a party so I was at home doing something. Saturday I played two soccer games, one at 2:30 and one at 5:30. We lost the first one 9-0? Something like that. After that game we went over to my Aunt's house and gave the twins their presents for their 4th birthday. Hooray for barbies and horsies for the barbies to ride on and dress up fuzzy pink stuff. So I went back to the soccer gig, and lost 5-2. Went home, h4x0red teh gibson and went to bed after spending way too much time online. Oh and today was great; I got to sleep in till 6:55 so I could be at a soccer game at 8:30 am! And we lost 2-0 and we should have won because the other team sucked! So then I went home and revved up the hot tub, only to exit an hour later when my Pink Floyd - Meddle album was done. Chemistry, then more soccer! We lost again! 7-1! gahahaha four losses in four games in two days! Hooray.

Oh except the game ran over and I got home at 6:05 instead of 5:30. And dad bothered me about getting a job, working on my eagle project, and then asked if i could show up at megan's late and I basically told him that since he was driving he could do whatever he wanted, but my opinion rested that I needed as much time as possible with megan, and that made him angry. Oh and when I called the reforee who made me cut off my fucking bracelet an asshole, dad got pretty upset cuz other parents were around. Seriously, I played the WHOLE FUCKING SEASON with it on, and one fucking ass old sideline whore of a ref told me to get off the field with it. And the head ref he had refforeed at least three other games of mine, including one EARLIER THAT FUCKING DAY! Those bitches. So now I don't have my bracelet megan gave me on. I didn't let myself get sad, in fact I got pissed and had a pretty aggressive attitude the rest of the game. So what was the aftermath of all of this?

I have a huge fucking bruise on my left shin, and a bruise on my left knee, and my feet are peeling off, and my groin muscles are inoperative, and everything feels tired as hell.

Then I took a shower and went to Megan's. And you know what? This has been an absolutely perfect weekend because of it. I needed that good cry. I need a lot from her; sometimes I feel guilty asking so much. Is it really that much? I don't know. I love her so much...

:: Floydthebarber 10/12/2003 09:41:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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One final Hoorah, Ladies and Gentlemen! I don't post for other people's benefit necesserily anyways, so I'm going to get all this fucking shit about Christina off of my chest, once and for all. I feel comfortable sharing our final conversation with the rest of the world. Feedback is most appreciated. This is over the span of three or so days.

> > > --- Steena wrote:
> > > > (you and megan) Need to go f*ck yourselfs, shes gay, your gay, your both stupid..
> > > > "little things pile up." that is sure familiar


Date: Sat, 4 Oct 2003 22:25:37 -0700 (PDT)
From: "James Freeman" | This is spam | Add to Address Book
Subject: Re: You and Megan...
To: "Steena"

hmmm? Is this really christina talking? I'm not quite sure what your "little things pile
up" reference is to, could you please elaborate? I'm always here to talk, and I don't
like leaving things on a bad note; I left the ball in your court to try and just say
something to me and i'll be responsive.

The last time you said anything like this to me, I let it get to me too much, agonizing
over your words of how you hated me and such. It only turned out that you were joking
around and it was the worst thing ever all I wanted was an apology. I'll assume you're
just typing this with no meaning behind it because 1) if you meant it, you'd say it to my
face 2) you'd supply some sort of explanation. I'd much rather be stupid with her than
anything else, but if you want to talk with me and reverse these little insults you've
resulted to then that's cool. I'll stop whatever it was before. Call me on the phone or
better than that. Don't just label me gay or i'll retreat even more. *sigh*


> --- Steena wrote:
> > Shut-up.


> -----Original Message-----
> From: James Freeman [mailto:floydthebarber18@yahoo.com]
> Sent: Tuesday, October 07, 2003 7:51 PM
> To: Steena
> Subject: RE: You and Megan...
>
> you confronted me with insults, so I'm assuming you want to talk with
> me. Or at least you
> were thinking of me, which is good I guess. What's going on with
> christina these days?
> I'm in the dark...
>
> I don't love you anymore. but I do care about you.


teena wrote:
> What in hell makes you think I love you, or even like you???!!!!
> That's what your problem was before; you couldn't stop accusing me of
> being in love with you or something. I'm not.


Date: Wed, 8 Oct 2003 17:09:09 -0700 (PDT)
From: "James Freeman" | This is spam | Add to Address Book
Subject: RE: You and Megan...
To: "Steena"


uh nothing, but you sent me an email... so I guess you had something to say to me @_@

-------------- I sent a second emale that day -------------

Date: Wed, 8 Oct 2003 18:11:51 -0700 (PDT)
From: "James Freeman" | This is spam | Add to Address Book
Subject: I'm Clearing Cobwebs
To: "Steena"


I never said I thought you loved me. Fucking christ, I stopped thinking about any love at
all between us anywhere well over a fucking year ago. I am assuming you're thinking of
me, which in turn makes me assume you don't absolutely hate me. And if you do, I deserve
to know why. I'm really sorry you don't want to be friends with me anymore; If you'd just
give me a fucking explanation about what you REALLY are feeling, this can all be put away
forever like you want. Is it a crime to still care about you even if you hate my fucking
guts? I stand by the fact that I never did anything major to hurt you, and that most of
it was constructed in your own mind.


--- Steena wrote:
> You're clearing cobwebs, and I have nothing to clear. I regret even
> notifying you about your sappy life, I wasn't jealous at all, just
> angry.
> Feelings can't be explained, or even put into words. So maybe you
> should just stop reading into to every freaking thing that someone says.
> You were doing it to Anna too, and that's what was making her upset.
> You never help.
> You continue to twist things up, and un-ravel what need not be brought
> up.
> Stop Analyzing Everything, and maybe if you react with your heart and
> soul, instead of what your brain tells you, you could actually
> comprehend the feelings that are associated with life. But, since it is
> such a terrible habit of yours, telling it to you, probably wont make a
> difference at all.
> Just forget it, and leave everyone else's life and the things they say:
> Alone.


And finally, James bows out
Date: Fri, 10 Oct 2003 17:52:01 -0700 (PDT)
From: "James Freeman" | This is spam | Add to Address Book
Subject: This is all I have left... Drained Me.
To: "Steena"


How can I have such a "sappy life" If I didn't react with feelings? They just aren't
unrestrained, crazy feelings like you always have. I guess you're right; I have no place
in your life or Annas or Jen's or anybody else like that who is wrapped up in personal
shit. I don't help or whatever like I used to; All I seem to be useful for nowadays is
clinging to Megan. I only learned to comprehend the feelings I have once I met her.
You're speaking from your point of view; I would hate to think that everybody wants me to
leave them alone like you do.

This all started when you told me you were moving and I got upset. I had every right to
be upset I wasn't frowning on what you're doing. I was listening to my heart and that's
why I got upset you were going. And you're gone. Maybe you're just trying to push
everybody away before you have to move so that they won't effect you so much when you
leave them. Thanks a lot. It's not that I can't associate the feelings that go along with
life; It's simply that in the past months I am unable to understand YOUR feelings on
life. My advice and learning about other people's life's and feelings has been sound as
it always has. People do not always like to hear the truth and I am not one to dress shit
up that explains why people like Anna get flustered with me sometimes- hell it upsets
Megan a lot too. But that's life.

I'm not going to play this little game where I listen to you and push myself into a
corner- if anything it's YOU who is pushing yourself away from everybody, both physically
by moving and emotionally. I just wanted to laugh with you a few more times, and enjoy
what you have to say and be able to tell you all the things that were on my mind, and get
something out of it. I can't quite pinpoint when it became wrong for me to come to you
with what's going on in my life and you stopped helping me out, and I stopped trying my
best to help you out. I haven't changed since those times. You have. I haven't been doing
anything different in the past, say, three months. Please don't accuse me of being a
heartless bastard towards everybody. I hated taking your picture out of the frame on my
dresser in the corner and replacing it with another of my new group of friends.

You just don't want to explain what you're feeling to me because you know yourself that
it doesn't make any sense. You've now become the little girl who clamps their hands over
their ears and yells LALALALALLALA when things are presented to them. Don't ever take
shots at me regarding other friends like Anna I'm doing my fucking best I am not a big
people person. People don't listen. Why have you gotten so cold hearted? I miss your
eyes. I guess I'll always miss your eyes. Have fun in new york, and if you see any bums
playing flute on the street, maybe you'll think of me (for better or for worse). I've got
all I need here in NC, I was hoping to end things on a good note with you, there's no
reason not to. Fine, I give up. There have been worse tragedies than somebody not caring
about me. It just hurts when I was there so much, that's all. Sweet dreams...


Feedback please.

:: Floydthebarber 10/10/2003 08:51:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
...

I'm not going to be able to do anything tonight, or tomorrow night, but sunday night is for Megan. The weekend after that I am gone at a fishing tournament, and that sunda night is for Megan. Two weekends from now is a campout which i'd really rather not go on, but If I do, I will be busy Friday and Saturday and that Sunday night is for Megan. The weekend after THAT is fucking halloween! And such!

:: Floydthebarber 10/10/2003 06:31:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
...

I got my first game to review for N-Philes- Lego Bionicle from THQ. I shall try to write up most of the review this weekend, perhaps have it ready by monday or tuesday. Yay!

What was I going to say regarding Megan. I think it's along the lines of I love her and I am being a bit dramatic in this blog. Adios!

:: Floydthebarber 10/07/2003 07:46:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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I just dropped in to let you all know what condition my condition was in. I am not giving up. That's what love is about. How can it have such negative effects, I have no idea whether to blame myself or not for that. I am a pretty good screw up though. How much more careful do I have to be with words? I'm already on tip toes in a labyrinth of trip cables.

rawrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr let's see whoops telephone

:: Floydthebarber 10/07/2003 05:11:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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Oops I'm busy.

:: Floydthebarber 10/07/2003 04:33:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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HOVERCRAFT! may the pictures speak for themselves:















yayayayayayayayayay too lazy to talk. We rock.

:: Floydthebarber 10/04/2003 04:16:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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sexcellent sirs, thank you for arriving to the tent on time. You could hardly tell it was a tent if not for the stripes, no? That and the echoes; you will have to excuse the horrible reverb in here as I profess what I have been thinking. Billy, sit up! Doctors, please sit Billy up! It appears his left leg has ripped- can we get some tape in here? Yes, yes.... *covers podium mic* just a little....yes fold it on the edge like that to keep him propped...yes yes quite good. *ahem* I'm terribly sorry gentlemen, this sort of thing happens often when delivering such a speech to patients such as those I deal with regularly. So then, where was I? Had I crumbled yet? No? If I keep pressing I will reach the blood-drenched center, you say? How dreadful! Allow me to gather these strewn thoughts for a moment. None of you are even listening? It is times like these where I wish to cut meals to half-sized morsels to you all! How drealfully atrocious this speech has turned! Billy! That leg! Unfold it this instant, aircraft are strickly forbidden! Yes yes darling, I hear your calm voice trying to sooth me, but now is the time to unravel and join the audience... Remember that speck of dust on your fingernail this morning? Poof.

:: Floydthebarber 10/02/2003 07:37:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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I'm sending files over AIM, so I figured I'd procrastinate my chemistry studying by doing this survey that sharp took. hee haw!

001) What time are you starting this?: 4:21
003) Date of birth?: July 23rd, 1987
004) Sex?: boy who likes girls who like girls and boys
005) Height?: 5'10" or something
006) Eye color?: Hazel Green
008) Location?: Cary, North Carolina, USAAA max 300
009) Where were you born?: here
010) Have you ever failed a grade?: nope
011) If you have, what grade did you fail?: QUESTION VOID
013) Do you have a bf/gf?: I sure do
014) If so, what is their name: Megan
015) How long have you been together?: 7 months, 2 weeks, 2 days, and 23 hours ish
016) What are you wearing right now?: Red plaid pajama pants, a 4 year old tee shir
017) Would you have sex before marriage?: I like Sharp's answer. I'd normally say no, but If we were enganged and planned on getting married within the month, I might consider it. It's purely circumstancial. Dun wanna ruin a special thing.
018) Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: I crushed one of my teachers.
019) Do you smoke? No
020) Do you drink?: No
021) Are you ghetto?: By the way I walk and the way I..nevermind
023) Are you a player?: yeah I can AA Max 300 on Standard
024) What are your favorite colors?: Green and uh more green
025) What is your favorite animal?: Penguin
026) Do you have any birthmarks?: A little brown spot on my right foot. I think it's my right (like i'm gonna check)
027) Have you ever gotten your ass kicked?: No
029) Have you ever beat someone up?: Grammar Police!
030) Annoyances? Conformists
031) Have you ever been slapped?: Plenty of times. I often deserve it.
032) Do you get online a lot?: More than I should
033) Are you shy or outgoing?: Outgoing, but only to people deserving of it.
034) Do you shower?: I sleep in the shower \m/
035) Do you hate school?: In most ways yes, but I enjoy learning and mocking people to boost my self esteem in a shallow sort of way
036) Do you have a social life?: Like a double sided coin. Whenever it lands on the edge things get weird.
037) How easily do you trust people?: It takes some time.
038) Have you ever lied to your bestfriends?: Of course
039) Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: My brain IBM
040) Would you ever sky dive?: Yes
041) Do you like to dance?: GaGHASDLFKH*chokes* no. no no no no no. Horribly insecure, James is.
068) Have you ever been out of state?: Not enough
069) Do you like to travel?: Yes
070) Have you ever been expelled from school?: Yeah!
071) Have you ever been suspended from school?: Yeah!
071) Do you want to get out of your hometown?: Not unless I take some folks with me. Especially her.
073) Are you a brat?: What the fuck.
074) Have you ever been dumped?: If you want to call it that, then yes.
075) Have you ever gotten high?: ~~~~~~~~~~shoa i'm fukcin
076) What's your favorite drink?: Mountain Dew.
077) Do you like Snapple?: Only when i'm tempted at Jersey Mikes
078) Do you drink a lot of water?: Not really
079) What toothpaste do you use?: Icky ones since I know they work best
080) Do you have a cell phone or pager?: Like I want to talk with people that much
081) Do you have a curfew?: Not really, my parents rock. No seriously I could stay out till 2 am if they knew who I was with.
082) Who do you look up to?: somebody nobody's hear of, let's see.... Chookriakis Malatowahoney
083) Are you a role model?: Not really
084) Have you ever been to Six Flags?: No. Cedar Point road trip in 2004 WHAT UP
085) What name brand do you wear the most?: I don't know
086) What kind of jewelry do you wear?: A watch, and this bracelet Megan braided for me
087) What do you have pierced?: Nothing
088) What do you want pierced?: Nothing
089) Do you like taking pictures?: Yep. I'm in Photography club.
090) Do you like getting your picture taken?: Not normally, unless the purpose of the picture is self-humiliation
091) Do you have a tan?: No
092) Do you get annoyed easily?: Don't piss me off, Art.
093) Have you ever started a rumor?: OMG A RUMOR WHERE
094) Do you have your own phone/phone line?: Like I want to talk with people that much.
095) Do you have your own pool?: Never
096) Do you have any siblings?: Two brothers, 14 and 11
097) Do you prefer boxers or briefs?: Boxers or nothing.
098) Have you ever been played?: Yes.
099) Have you ever played anyone?: No.
100) Do you get along with your parents?: Yes.
102) How do you vent your anger?: kick someone from #n-philes <-- I like sharp's answer.
103) Have you ever run away?: Yes bikes are slow
104) Have you ever been fired from a job?: I wish I had time for a job.
105) Do you even have a job?: no
106) Do you daydream a lot?: of her
107) Do you think pregnant chicks should smoke? Only if they are under 18
108) Do you run your mouth?: No
109) What do you want a tattoo of?: stop it with the tatoos
110) What do you have a tattoo of?: stop it with the tatoos
111) What are your favorite flowers?: weird colored roses
112) What does your ex bf/gf look like?: a what
113) What does your most recent crush look like?: They look like twin millionaires who starred on some family show named Full House
114) Have you ever been bitched out?: I can't remember.
115) When was the last time you bitched someone out?: This is getting annoying
116) Are you rude?: Read up.
117) What was the last compliment you received?: "I like your black people shoes, James"
118) Do you like getting dirty?: No
119) Is your bellybutton an innie or outie?: Innie, outies are for freaks.
121) What is your heritage?: English? Farmers don't keep track of heritage well.
122) What is your lucky number?: 18 or something.
123) What does your hair look like right now?: A giant poofy dirty blonde mushroom.
124) Could you ever be a vegetarian?: I don't think so.
125) When was your last real heartbreak?: Find the blog archives from about july of 2002.
126) Describe your looks?: Nintendo shirt, mismatched pants, chuck taylors, fucked hair.
128) Would you ever date someone younger than you?: Yes oh wait
129) Would you ever date someone older than you?: I suppose, but it would be quite awkward
130) When was the last time you were drunk?: never
131) When was the last time you went on a date?: Nevar
133) Have you ever given?: *no comment*
134) Have you ever received?: *no comment* Silence does NOT mean yes, I just prefer to maintain privacy.
135) Have you ever had an eating disorder?: No
136) Do you have one now?: No
137) How many rings until you answer the phone?: As many as possible
138) Have you ever been skinnydipping?: When I was all by myself on the AT. Tee Hee.
139) If yes, when was the last time?: 2 years ago.
140) Do you look more like your mother or father?: My mom
141) Do you cry a lot?: Not as much as I used to
142) Do you ever cry to get your way?: No
143) If you had to amputate one limb, what would it be?: Right leg
144) What phrase do you use most when on the phone?: "hello"
145) Are you the romantic type?: I try to be. Seems to be working.
146) Have you ever been chased by cops?: RUN FROM TEH PO PO
147) What do you like most about your body?: My eyes
148) What do you like least about your body?: My teeth
150) When was the last time you threw up?: This past summer after doing the swim test at 7 am and I hadn't swam in over a year.
151) In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?: Blondes
152) What do the shoes you last wore look like?: Black with white peace signs
153) Do you ever wear shirts to show your belly?: no.
154) What about cleavage?: Of course
155) Is your best friend a virgin?: Haha, I'm imagining the hilarity if he isn't.
156) Have you ever fucked someone up?: YES
157) Have you ever been fucked up?: YES
158) What color are your underwear right now?: Blue da ba dee
159) What theme does your room have?: Tons of video game posters. Literally no wall space left.
160) What size shoe do you wear?: 9.5-10
167) What do you sleep in?: little to nothing, I lock my door.
168) Has there ever been a rumor spread about you?: yes
169) What is one of your bad qualities?: I am not considerate enough
170) What is one of your good qualities?: I'm very analytical
171) Would you marry for money?: No
172) What do you drive?: Mom's Ford Escape or my 1992 minivan. \m/
173) Have you ever given or received roadhead?: Haha, no. And I got all excited about this question "OH MAN A RADIOHEAD QUESTION!" :(
174) Are you more of a mama or daddy's child?: momma
175) What does your lj username mean?: It means I grew up in a certain state and have a certain love for weird names and barber shops.
176) What's your favorite lj to read?: Sharp's or Megan's
177) When was the last time you cried in school?: Never.
178) Do you wear Chucks?: All the time.
179) What time are you finished? 4:58 fuck you

:: Floydthebarber 10/01/2003 04:15:00 PM (0) comments [+] ::
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